Ante
by FatedtoFall
Summary: Miroku is harassing InuYasha, but why, exactly is he? [Oneshot, Implied InuKag Rated for Inu's mouth]


A/N: Because, I have no life. Thats why this exists. Neh. Laugh, I say.

Betaed? Betad? Betaded? By Ammeh. Nee.

I dun own Inuyasha, but I wish I did just like everyone else.

* * *

"You're an idiot, you realize this, yes?"

"What? Why the hell are you sayin' that?"

"Because, you are!"

"Shut the hell up, Miroku, before I hurt you."

"No, no… I just… didn't think it possible for you to be so stupid!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"That means, Inuyasha, that you just wasted a prime opportunity!"

"A prime opportunity for what?"

"To tell her, of course!"

"To tell who what?"

"Kagome!"

"Tell Kagome what?"

"That you love her, of course!"

"What the hell? I don't love Kagome, you stupid Monk! Why the hell would I tell her I did!"

"Liar. We all know you're head over heels for her! And you just wasted a prime opportunity!"

"You're an idiot Miroku, shut up."

"No, no! I have seen how you look at her, that softening of your gaze, your ears flattening when you think no one is watching! You get the most endearing little blush on your face, as well!"

"What the hell? And why're ya looking, anyway?"

"That's not the point here, Inuyasha! The point is, you had Kagome in your arms! The sun is setting; myself and Sango were out of earshot! It was your shot!"

"What? What the hell is with you? I don't love Kagome, hell, I don't even think I like her!"

"You, Inuyasha, are an idiot!"

"You're repeating yourself!"

"I wouldn't have to if you would just listen to reason! Remember, denial is not just a river in Egypt, Inuyasha!"

"What? And where the hell is Egypt?"

"I… Don't know, I read it in one of Kagome's books. But that is not the point! The point is, you love her, and you just missed the choice opportunity to tell her! You had her in your arms!"

"The stupid wench tripped over a root!"

"Ahh, but you are an idiot Inuyasha!"

"That's it! Shut up, Miroku!"

* * *

Miroku watched, his expression serene despite the growing lump on his head, as Inuyasha stormed away, form tense. Ahh, it seemed he had pushed the half demon too far. And all he had been trying to do, in his wise and magnanimous way, was help to move the two along. It was so very obvious that they were crazy about each other. Now all they had to do was realize it.

Ahh, but the life of such a virtuous and sage monk as him was a difficult one.

Miroku's expression did not change as Sango approached, Kirara following and Shippou perched upon her shoulder. Her expression was dubious at best as she studied him critically.

"What was that all about?" She asked, eyeing Miroku from his prone position on the ground.

"Why, my dear Sango, simply a minor disagreement between men." He replied, eyes closed and face placid.

"Right. So, it has nothing to do with a certain wager we made a few months ago?" She pressed.

"I have no idea of this… Wager you speak of, my dear Sango. I, as a monk, and devote follower of Buddha, would not make a wager of any type." He replied.

"Uh-huh. So, you don't remember betting me that Inuyasha would declare his love for Kagome by sunset today a few months ago?" Sango said, smiling slightly.

"I would not do such a thing, Sango, for I am a monk and a devote--"He protested, eyes open and innocent.

"--Follower of Buddha. Right. Uh-huh. Pay up, Monk, you lose." Sango grinned.

"But--" He started, but was interrupted by Shippou.

"Aww, stop being such a sore loser, Miroku. I lost as well and I didn't whine nearly as much as you."

"But-- " He started again.

"Pay up, Monk." Sango stated firmly, glancing at the sun as it set.

"But, Sango…!" He tried again.

"Pay. Up." She stated once more, looking quite formidable in the half light.

"Fine." He whined. "I swear that for 3 weeks, I will keep my hands to myself."

"And…?" Prompted Sango.

"That includes touching, squeezing, groping, leering, peeping while you and Kagome bathe, or while any other female is bathing, and any general contact with a female body part that she does not invite me to touch. Are you happy?" He recited, voice taking on a pitiful tone.

"Yes!" Replied Sango cheerfully, turning around and nearly dancing away, leaving the still prone monk with the ever growing lump on his head to himself.

"There's gotta be a loophole in there somewhere…"

* * *

Ending A/N: Ante is a poker term, like betting to get in on the hand so not everyone comes up empty handed. I watch real poker tournaments, not the geeky little Celebrity ones, Neh. Be happy. Review? -puppy eyes- 


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